Most of the wounds people have in life are unseen. They are deep under the skin; often broken cognitive connections, unknown insecurities, unexplainable anxieties, emotional detachment, cravings for control, retreat into substances, and fight for self preservation. These are the coping skills of wounded people. All these share something in common when it comes to relationships, they are easily offended and/or quick to break ties with uncomfortable circumstances. Avoidance is the most logical practice given a difficult situation. The wounded often interpret the world around them through the lens of their own experience. That experience becomes truth they live by and experience is mistaken for the Holy Spirit. The inner life is what drives our outer life. If we are disquieted on the inside whether it be pain from hurt, worry, scarred by abuse, or a drive for control, we will struggle to live a healthy life. Our health will consequently be effected by our inner life. The only hope and help for this is the peace of Christ in the gospel, the forgiveness through the gospel, and the power to live by faith given us by the gospel. We are not whole (healthy) persons yet, but in Christ we are being made new. Trust the process of grace. As we give ourselves away in service to others we discover more uncomfortable and broken things about ourselves, and thus, cast more worries upon the Lord.
The unpleasant way of healing involves getting close to others and living in community. It is in this community we discover our unseen wounds and insecurities of our fallen condition. Ask our Father to do all the heavy lifting (cast your cares upon him) and He will lift and heal the damage wrought by sin whether it is our own or what someone else did (see James 5:14-16). Ultimately, what keeps us from growing spiritually and becoming healthier is our pride–the mother of all hiding places. One can fake a lot of things in life, but humility cannot be faked. The evidence of humility is clear. Remember, “God opposes the proud (He withholds good), but He gives grace to the humble. ” When God opposes the proud, he does not lift the heaviness of sin and yoke of frustration. In His opposition, he does not give what is needed to become healthy and mature. Consequently, relationships suffer and we go on being offended and offending unhealthy patterns of behavior. Much of the time, we are completely unaware of how we handle conflict because our normal behavior is actually abnormal.
But God gives “grace to the humble” which is restorative. This grace produces God’s desired effects. Cast our “wounds” upon Christ. Don’t take matters into your own hands. Don’t try to fix others in order to ignore yourself. Often, healing is found in obeying the “one another” commands. Pride always militates against humility which is the first step towards obedience. Humble yourself and grace will life you up to live pleasing to God and enjoy His friendship. Don’t forget, healing is often a process because God intends to keep us dependent on Him so that we might learn to say, “The Lord is my portion; and I will wait for Him” (Lam. 3:34; Ps. 73:26). Remember, our healing is a sure future reality called the resurrection of our bodies.
Pastor Preston Atkinson
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